There is another path on the mountain
way while we were hiking; should I take it or not?
My family and I got up at 4 a.m. because
we decided to hike on the spur of the moment. It was a morning in late autumn, the
sun is still under horizon and the sky is still in dark blue with a few stars twinkled.
The air was cold that froze my nose into red like Rudofph. Trees beside the
mountain road we walked by, the wild grass and unknown flowers was sparkle with
dew.
We walked for about half of an hour, the
sun came out gradually and there I saw the path. I was in an age full of curiosity
and passion for fantasies at that time. Therefore, the path really attracted
me. I then told my parents and turned our way to it.
It was wreathed in cool mist that the
tree seemed to be bigger than before. Fallen leaves covered the path, looked like a carpet of maroon, rustled when we tread on it. The scene recalled the poetry
The Road not Taken by Robert Frost, so quiet,
inaccessible and peace. It was about six, and the sun shone brightly in the azure
sky though the brown leaves covered the most. Scraps of sunshine fell on floor, the dewdrops shone on little mushroom and spider webs glistened like pearls. I
took a
deep breath and morning fresh air filled my lung. Such a finest opening
of a day in my life!
I chose the path I had never seen before, like Robert Frost did, no regret but only surprise. Because of the path and the experience, I could
tell that magic forest does exist.
(This picture doesn't belong to me, it belongs to this website: http://www.panoramio.com/photo/42984688)
2015.12.01
I like the part how you describe the beauty of the path. I think you have done well on detailing the view vividly. I can even picture a scene of the path in my mind and the poetry's description can make me feel the serene feelings of the woods.
回覆刪除 Pay attention to verb tense. Stories stay in past tense.
回覆刪除 We use the definitive article 'the' in front of many nouns.
Put 's' on plural nouns
Good descriptive writing. You recreate the mood of the forest and path vividly.
It would be easier to read if this didn't have the black background